A Memorable Loss
During the seventh grade in the Spring of 2012, I was a basic honor roll student with basic friends. On March 29th, the principal of the school announced there would be a spelling bee in a week. It was a public event with a half-filled gymnasium with the noises of parents pep talking their children. The feeling of stress and anxiety hung heavy in the air. The looks of pumped up students compared to the stressed out or anxious students. I don’t like spelling bees, and I don’t even know why I was even involved with this one at all, and I just knew that I would have to prepare myself for it.
The day after the principal’s announcement, I had no intentions of signing up for it. My friend had told me to sign up because I used to correct his spelling back in elementary school; I told him there was a difference between talking to one person vs. speaking to hundreds of people. Even though I told him I wasn’t going he still signed me up anyway, and I was angry with him, but he was thinking I could use the prize, which was a $250 Visa gift card. Thinking of the prize, I started to prepare for the spelling bee in a week, I still tried to prepare regardless of my fear, but it was still in the back of my mind pulling me back to remember it was there.
I told my parents about the spelling bee and how I was going to prepare for it. They supported me and my decision, even though it wasn’t mine. They told me if I needed any help if I could ask them for it. My plan to prepare was to study the list of words the faculty gave the students that were participating in the spelling bee and learn each word backwards and forwards. Even preparing like that there was a nagging feeling behind me about my anxiety in front of a bunch of people.
No matter how much I studied, no matter how much I prepared, there was always that feeling of stage fright. Standing in front of a bunch of people was frightening to me, that and I had to spell words in front of all of them. Spelling for me is not that hard because I’ve been decent at spelling since first grade. My vocabulary wasn’t all that impressive, but if I knew the word and how it was used, I could spell it no problem, and I think that’s the reason my friend signed me up for the spelling bee. As the days grew closer to the spelling bee date, my anxiety and stress started to grow as well. I told my parents about my stress build up and their response to that was that I could back out while there was still time, but I didn’t like backing out of tasks like this, I didn’t like backing out at all. There were only a couple more days until the big day so I continued to prepare for it trying to disregard my fears and anxiety.
The big day finally arrived, and I felt like I was as prepared as I could’ve been. My parents were there as well as my friends to support me through the competition. The judges called on each contestant in alphabetical order according to last name, which was good and bad for me. It was good because I got to go first before everyone else and get it over with, and it was bad because I had to go first before everyone else and have the honor of being eliminated first. Before they started calling names, I looked at the thousands of people out in front of me and I immediately started to fall apart, but my friend in the audience shouted, “Don’t let fear rule your life.” With that I pulled what little courage I had gathered before hand and stood up to the mic when the judges called my name. Since we were just starting, the words were pretty easy, my word was “prototype” and even with my fear pulling on me I continued and spelled the word correctly. The first round went by with only one elimination. As the competition continued, I was still feeling uneasy. I looked at my friends and family and gathered more courage to stand up and speak again. Round after round passed, more and more contestants were eliminated until there was me and two other people. The two that were known for being incredibly gifted in learning, everyone called them “The Prodigy Duo.” I was not only afraid but intimidated as well. The next one to stand was me and my word was “flabbergasted” and then my fear struck me when it felt like the atmosphere in the air thickened, and it started getting hard to focus. I misspelled the word even though I knew how to spell it correctly.
Even though I lost, my friends and family were still there cheering me on for making it as far as I did, which was an achievement itself. I think I did pretty good for my first spelling bee for a kid that didn’t like speaking in public and had to go up against “The Prodigy Duo.” That night we all went out for dinner to commemorate my third place in a spelling bee.
Reflection
After rereading my memoir, I can tell the errors and mistakes I made on it in the beginning of the semester and I know what I would do to fix or change them now. One error I made that I could’ve fixed then was that I didn’t use very vivid detail in my story. I could’ve gone into a lot more detail during my explanation of the spelling bee or used more imagery during the explanation on how I felt during that time. Another error I could fix would be the common comma errors. I can point out and correct them now that I know how to catch most of them and how to correct them. I could also work on my attention grabber. I now know better ways to catch attention to my writings and these ways I didn’t know when I first started this and I think I could’ve reworked my new knowledge into my memoir. My plot for my memoir was pretty strong and it stayed on track as well. It made sure that the reader wasn’t lost on how things went throughout the story and it could also relate to some people that could’ve been in that predicament before.