Blog 10

I have gained more knowledge from Cross-Cultural Psychology than was anticipated at the beginning.  I knew I would approach this subject as something I will continue to learn about throughout my life experience, not something which has a finish line or a task with any type of completion.  I did not expect to better understand myself through this class, but I definitely do.  I understand how little I know and how little I have experienced.  I have a greater understanding of subtle differences in behavior and communication and really believe they should be celebrated.  These differences are intriguing and it makes me all the more curious.  While I have a better understanding of differences, I do feel I have a long way to go to be competent in successful intercultural communication and just need to have more exposure and experiences in and around other cultures to grow.  This field of research is still very new and it is very necessary for the future of our world as the boundaries are forever changed.  This is important for individuals in political science, business, mental health and virtually any career path you can imagine.  I did not fully comprehend how new this field of research was before we got into the course or how much work remains to be done.  Nor did I see the big picture of how instituting this education as mandatory curriculum might have a domino effect.  This should be taught before we reach upper level undergraduate school.  Teaching about cultural diversity should start in grade school so it is part of an academic program to incorporate diversity awareness into our cultural schema.

Creating blog posts, assignment takeaways and deciding on my top artifacts definitely expanded my comfort zone.  I created a similar e-portfolio in Social Psychology several years ago.  It was uncomfortable then, this was a bit more rewarding and somewhat therapeutic.  Forcing me to self-analyze and review situations and experiences with a growth mindset is very rewarding.

The greatest skill I learned through this semester was not to make assumptions about anyone.  Cultural differences exist in a wide variety of instances we may not be aware of, so just do not make assumptions; and if you are feeling emotional about an interaction try to determine what is causing the emotion and consider the intent or misinterpretation of intent.  It is easy to make mistakes, but it is better to learn from them by examining what is really happening.

Looking back on the first assignment takeaway, I have definitely changed my mind about foreign language.  I want to learn to speak Spanish.  This would be a valuable skill even if I will never speak fluently.  This may very well impact my career as a student, mental health professional and as an Aunt.  I was feeling this tug at my heart before reading the chapter on communication, but it is definitely something I intend to do at my community college.  This will provide me with better experiences and much more growth in areas needed in my community and abroad.

The image I chose for this post is an illustration of a “Wise Woman” and it is a status I will continue to relentlessly chase. This course has been an important part of the journey.

Blog 9

The top three things I have learned during this semester in Cross-Cultural Psychology so far are that being culturally aware is a lifelong learning experience, the first part of the process is being self-aware, and many cultural differences are developed through biopsychosocial methods.  We covered many developmental theories and how they relate cross-culturally.  Some aspects of Piaget’s theory were found to be universal others were criticized, specifically because the timeline of stages were not universal and the measurement of the fourth stage was not measured in a culturally appropriate way.  The things we hold to be true from Piaget’s theory are children are actively involved in their development, are shaped by socialization from significant others and the processes are continuous across the lifespan (Matsumoto, Juang, 2017). 

Through self-reflection a person can gain a better understanding of their own cognitive development and by so doing understand how differences in cultural perspective can be developed in different environmental and social settings.  I did a great deal of self-reflection on what motivates me and my self-construal.  Even before we got to this section of the learning, I was aware I had an interdependent self-construal.  I remember this from my childhood and how we networked in our small community to survive and greatly enjoyed reflecting on my childhood with my brother, who is one of my wild angels, and whose memory motivates me to be a healer in my community.   Human connection is a vital part of maintaining good mental and spiritual health. 

Terror management theory is an interesting theory, because I was faced with death when losing both my brother and my boyfriend more recently.  It is traumatic when death comes to your door and takes someone very precious from you and you lack the cognitive ability to find reason in the loss.  The act of death and the act of dealing with grief are both culturally diverse.  I myself had not been raised with religion; though I was baptized Catholic, after my parents divorced, I no longer attended church.  I was given the opportunity to attend church with friends growing up, but did not find any faith that suited me.  I felt a deep resentment toward the Patriarchal message I heard over and over again from the different pulpits and the message did not align with the actions of many of the people attending sermons, creating cognitive dissonance with regards to religion for me.  So I avoided it because it made me uncomfortable.  When I experienced profound grief for the first time, I was lost.  I found my own way, through my own reading and understanding of nature.  I even had a lucid dream just months before my brother’s death which gave me an understanding, which was later affirmed by the founding Swami of Yogaville, “There are many paths, but one Truth,” whether it be science or religion.  It is just one way to try to understand nature and there are definitely things beyond our understanding.  This terror management theory I believe gets to the heart of the biopsychosocial methods.  As Sri Swami Satchidananda says, “I’m not the body, not the mind, immortal Self I am! In all conditions I am Knowledge Bliss Absolute!”

Cultural Display Rules is a concept which was very interesting as well and we learned how to implement and be aware of the different expectations in my Intro to Human Services class by using the RESPECTFUL model which states that to better serve as a helper you must understand these aspects of the client: religious/spiritual identity, economic class/background, sexual identity, level of psychological development,  ethnic/racial identity, chronological/developmental challenges, various forms of trauma and other threats to one’s sense of well-being, family background and history, unique physical characteristics and location of residence and language differences.  These cover a broad range of culturally diverse identities and the understanding of these on behalf of the client can prevent miscommunication and misdiagnosis in the mental health professions.  Understanding different cultures have different expectations for how to display emotion is very important.  Especially for men in Western cultures who are expected to not display emotion, causing a significant disparity in the treatment of addiction and mental health disorders in this demographic and leading to a significantly higher suicide and overdose rate.

The picture I chose is another of Bryan with his son Xavier and his step-daughter Adrianna.  Adrianna is still here and is experiencing significant grief with her loss, but still manages to persevere and I am insanely proud of her for becoming an EMT.  Two thirds of this picture is missing from this plane of existence because they were not able to get the help they needed because they were ashamed to ask for it, and there is a severe lack of resources and awareness in our community.

Blog 8

Jennifer Torres-Fuentes (Jenny) is the mother of my brother Michael’s son and she was born in Puerto Rico, but raised in Virginia.  Even though Puerto Rico is a United States territory people who identify themselves as Puerto Rican are proud of their nation and heritage.  Jenny is no exception.  She is the first person who came to mind reading about cultural display rules because her expression of any emotion was always more intense than anything I had ever experienced.  It was not until I was around her family who flew in for my brother’s service that I realized this was a cultural thing.  Her family was so loud and boisterous.   They were so happy and joyful, and intensely remorseful for our loss, but also so empathetic to Jenny and myself.  Even though I did not know what they were saying, as I could not understand what they were saying with my limited Spanish. They spoke so fast, and over top of each other and they were so loud. The energy though could be felt in a language which is universal. I felt love. It was written on their faces and expressed with all the genuine emotions they proudly displayed on their faces.

My brother spent way more time around Jenny’s family than I did, and I always wondered why one of his favorite amusements was to get Jenny upset.  He would tease her or pick at her about things just to get her sympathetic nervous system to engage because her voice would get louder and louder and when she started speaking in Spanish he would get this mischievous grin on his face.  To him it was a game to get her ignited because he thought it was cute.  Until I saw her around her family I never understood this, I always thought she was really angry at him, and not just mildly irritated.  Her expression of any emotion was always so intense, because it was culturally appropriate to express emotion gregariously.

Coming from an environment where I was always told to control my temper, not to let people see me cry or draw attention to myself, this was a foreign concept and to my brother it was beautiful.  It took a while to realize why he found it as beautiful, but it was because she did not have to filter herself in front of the people she loved, she had to at work, or around unfamiliar others, but around her family she could let it all out.  To him, making her come undone and start ranting in Spanish meant he was family and she loved him.  Odd translation to some perhaps, but I know this in my heart to be true. 

The image I am including is one of Jenny’s faces, where my brother said something to ignite her just as she took a bite of food because the emotion is all over her face.  She wants to ignite, but she is at a party among friends and co-workers, and cannot, instead the intensity is in her eyes and only he and those who know and love her can see it.

Blog 7

Fairy Tales are typically cautionary tales adapted from folklore, reflecting historical or otherwise significant events which are culturally relevant.  They often use symbolism as a means to describe problems in society or great tragedies which have occurred.  If the symbolism is overlooked by the audience, due to lack of developmental ability to see and comprehend things in the abstract, then the message the author is trying to convey could be misconstrued.  Furthermore the works of Disney do not reflect the symbolism in the Grimm collection of Fairy Tales, which include more historical and culturally significant foreshadowing and symbolism.  This is true of all the Disney renditions of these classic tales.  He includes details of wonderment, but excludes the darker side because these details are not culturally significant to his audience and his intent was to introduce the characters, not the symbolic meaning of the tale.  Even now, these adaptations to Beauty and the Beast do not necessarily reflect the principles of Disney as he was not the author, but are meant to commercialize the characters, not teach a lesson.  This is the capitalist’s version, and it loses significance except for the profits it makes a corporation.  This explains Disney remaking these tales from all over the world into McFairy Tales to be consumed by the American population.  Our culture worships money so Disney just rebranded different culturally diverse tales, erasing much of their significant folklore in order to sell more merchandise.

I selected the image to represent inclusion of various different cultures and backgrounds.  Disney has rebranded them all, and now that they own the Star Wars franchise, they have even rebranded intergalactic McFairy Tales.

Blog 6

There is no question my motivation academically is extrinsic in nature.  It does migrate to the integrated regulation side of the spectrum though for sure.  I am studying Psychology and Addiction Treatment and Prevention because of personal loss and wanting to advocate for change.  I am extrinsically motivated by the memory of those I have lost and the outrage I feel for how far we fall short with this health disparity.  This pain and the grief is a part of me and it is all I have left of them.  It represents all the things these people cannot present to the world; their smile, charm, grace, passion; all of it lost because of a mental health disorder that went untreated.  I cannot bring them back, but I can honor their memory by fighting for change.  I decided on this path as a means to maintain my own sanity in a sense.  This is why it has integrated with my sense of self.  The change it brings to society in my community will be collateral improvement.

I satisfy my need for autonomy by deciding on my focus based on my own personal interests in the field.  Working specifically with a population of people, most health care professionals and criminal justice professionals would rather avoid.  This particular demographic of people and the work itself are challenging to say the least, and it is not a choice based on monetary compensation or prestige.  It is an autonomous choice made to provide a sense of purpose and reason.

I satisfy my need for competence by the nature of who I am.  I am a born healer. I practice good listening and study hard in order to excel in every course I take.  If something makes me uncomfortable, uneasy or frightened, I attack it directly.  When I went back to college after twenty years I was terrified of math.  I had to take several pre-requisite courses in order to take a college level math class. I attacked this goal first.  When I transferred to Old Dominion University, I used the same strategy.  Knowing how difficult Quantitative Methods and Research Methods in Psychology would be I took those my first two semesters.  It was my understanding if I could complete those courses with an A, the rest of my course work would be cake.  To some extent this has proved true, though as circumstances would have it, personal loss has caused havoc with my course load plans over the last three years.  I have not given up though.  I am still motivated because my why, though extrinsic, it is integrated with my sense of self.

Satisfying my sense of relatedness proves to be the most challenging. I do my best with discussion board posts in my Human Services classes and maintaining relationships with fellow graduates from my community college days who also work in helping professions.  I have recently begun new employment which offers mental health services to their staff.  This is something I intend to take advantage of, and I believe will assist with the relatedness and potential burn out I may encounter with the workload and struggle I have maintaining a balance between work, school and family life. 

The image I chose is a picture of my former significant other Bryan; he died November 29, 2021.  His son, Xavier, pictured beside him had co-occurring disorders and committed suicide in June, 2020.  His birthday was December 10.  Bryan’s death is still under investigation, but there is speculation he may have overdosed, having been triggered by his son’s upcoming birthday.  He died very unexpectedly at his mother’s home. 

Blog 5

For statements one, two and seven I responded with words associated with an independent construal of self.  Describing me as powerful, intelligent and focused respectively refers to attributes which are internally motivated and benefit me as an individual.  For statements three, four, five, six, eight, nine and ten I responded with words associated with an interdependent construal of self.  Describing me as worthy, kind, empathic, passionate, selectively outgoing, patient and articulate respectively refers to attributes which are externally motivated and benefit my ability to maintain relationships with those close to me.  Based on my responses it seems it is easier for me to describe myself from an interdependent construal of self.  The results of this exercise do not surprise me.

“There is no I in Team”, “Team work makes the dream work”, “You are only as strong as the weakest link,” and “Be the change you want to see in the world” are the expressions of popular wisdom that came to mind for this exercise.  It definitely seems the interdependent construal of self is easier for me to conjure, though this may be due to my many years of work in hospitality where interdependence was necessary for success. 

The visual image I am including is a picture of me during my Reiki training on a trip to Tennessee.  Here I worked with my mentor and other classmates to perform a Japanese form of energy healing.  The very nature of this ritualistic method of healing is based on the interconnection of the higher self with others and their life energy.  The connectedness I felt during this retreat was profound and life changing.  I fell in love with these ladies and we formed a strong bond over a very short period of time.

Blog 4

I prepared to take the exam by completing the Study Guide for Exam 1.  I spent two solid days preparing the study guide.  The second day something happened with my computer and I lost an entire days’ worth of work.  It was late, like 11:00pm and I was exhausted and a bit devastated.  I managed to not cry, and decided I would take the exam first thing in the morning since I had everything fresh in my mind.  I knew I would not have been able to reconstruct all the work I lost.  I simply did not have the time.  That is what I did.  I was easy on myself after I got the score.  It was definitely not as high as I am used to scoring.  I missed five questions. 

Reviewing the questions and looking up the correct answers was good review.   It allowed me to feel a little better about myself.  There was one question I answered incorrectly because I read the question wrong and just made a silly error.  For the remaining exams I will review my answers closely before submitting to make sure I did not read the question incorrectly.  The other four I probably would have done a bit better on if I had been able to keep the study guide I created and review it several more times before taking the exam. 

Moving forward, I will email the study guide to myself periodically so I do not lose so much work.  That moment was a devastating moment and I nearly came undone.  These things happen when working with technology and I know better.  I will email myself the study guide every three questions so I never have to have that sick feeling in the pit of my stomach again.  I will also review the exam study guide several times before taking the exam.  I may even attempt to create a practice test from the study guide to help prepare for the next two exams.  This was a fairly difficult exam, but I think I will score better knowing what to expect, having what I need to prepare and doing the best I can to manage my time.

I chose this visual image because it depicts the reaction I had the moment I realized I had lost my work after my computer crashed. I was devastated.

Blog 3

I scored high on openness.  This did not come as a surprise.  Working in the Virginia Wine Industry off and on for over a decade I had the opportunity to meet lots of very well-traveled individuals and learn about different cuisine, music, and art.  New experiences make me feel more alive.  I have learned to be kind to myself, as I cannot master everything I try, but just learn to appreciate the experience.  One of the things I have wanted to do for a very long time is ballroom dancing. I would also need to add after losing my brother, and then my ex-boyfriend, I am keenly aware of how precious life is and there is no time for fear or uncertainty.  I am happy to dive into new things.

I scored average on conscientiousness.  I consider myself to be a dependable person and could use improvement when it comes to organization.  I know the importance of balance in my life, and work at not guilting myself for boundaries I set for my time.  Sometimes letting household chores go so I can participate in selfcare activities or ordering a pizza for dinner if I do not have the time or energy to cook are definite compromises, I make to maintain a balance in my life.  Keeping the balance is challenging as a single mother who is working full time and going to school.  Being better organized would certainly help me maintain the balance.

I scored average on agreeableness.  I believe this one could have been either higher or lower, really depending on the circumstances.  I am only ambitious and hardheaded when it comes to what I am passionate about.  This does not mean I lack the ability to be empathic, it simply means I choose carefully when I stand my ground, and I am also learning to be a good communicator with regards to why I feel the need to stand my ground.  There are times I can be swayed, but there are certain things I hold my ground on because of my own moral understanding.

I scored very high on extraversion, which surprised me.  I do enjoy being around people and I guess the pandemic was difficult for me, feeling isolated, but I need alone time as well.  Being by myself helps me to ground and re-energize.  I even feel apprehension in large groups of people I do not know and have always assumed I had a mild form of social anxiety.  When I am around the people I love and feel comfortable with though, it brings me lots of joy. 

I scored average on neuroticism.  This is something I am aware needs improvement.  I try to remind myself to be kind to myself.  Not to feel guilty about what I am not able to accomplish or allow myself to feel cheated because of what I have lost.  These feelings still manage to creep in from time to time.  Anger, guilt, and deep sadness sometimes, but I actively remind myself of the things I have to be grateful for.

Blog 2

I chose this image for the blogpost because I was the first to graduate in my family with a degree from college, albeit an Associate’s Degree and they were and continue to be an inspiration for me.  My mother and father have been supporting my education since I left my ex-husband who is also pictured here with our two boys, Donovan and Connor.  My mother is in the front.  I had put my education on hold so JR, my ex-husband, could complete his degree, while I raised the kids and worked.  When it was my turn, our situation changed and long story short, I was left to figure out how to complete it without him.  This simply would not be possible without the support of my parents financially and my children with assisting me in every other aspect of maintaining our home on a daily basis so I have the time to complete my school work and still maintain full time employment to support myself and my kids.

My reason for pursuing higher education originally was to find a direction or purpose after my brother Michael died.  I was driving by the community college campus one day and just pulled in and signed up.  This picture is two years later when I graduated with my associates.  This was a very emotional day.  I dropped out of school when I was seventeen, got my GED later and never dreamed I would be able to accomplish something like this.  I did not believe I was smart enough and never dreamed as a single mother I would ever have the energy or time to do it.  My ex-husband supported our basic needs while I attended community college full time and completed my associate’s degree.  He would not however pay for my student loan debt because he was building an escape fund for him and his new wife instead.  I found out when I opened a bank statement with over $20,000.00 in it in just his name. It was after further investigation of our financials I discovered he had not been paying on my student loan.  I made arrangements to leave and file for legal separation.

Having been through so much more since then, including a very ugly divorce, the rehabilitation of my daughter (not pictured), a custody battle over my youngest son and the death of the one person I dated after my divorce, I refuse to give up on myself or my dreams.  The time I have here is to be cherished; chasing what inspires me and that which will leave a legacy for my children.  They can say so many things about me, but they will never say I gave up.  And when it is all said and done, it is my real family who has supported me through the most difficult and painful times, not the family I married into.  I am so grateful to have found the courage to leave an unhealthy marriage and find strength in myself and those who really truly believe in me. 

Through my continued journey at ODU I have studied all the required courses for my BS in Psychology and have been able to implement some of what I have learned in both my personal life, raising my adolescent and early adult children, and professional life when dealing with difficult behavior from clients and using constructive communication with both team members and leaders to resolve conflict.  After the completion of my minor requirements for the HMSV department in Addiction Treatment and Prevention I look forward to applying to graduate school and putting my education to work in my field of study.  The next chapters will be wholly enjoyed. No matter where they take me I will seize the opportunities which inspire me the most and lead me into the direction of the future I want to create.

Blog 1

This course is designed to investigate our understanding of psychological theories across cultures beyond the W.E.I.R.D.O.S. demographic.  I first heard the acronym W.E.I.R.D.O.S. in a Sociology course my sophomore year at a community college.  Belonging to this demographic, it is important to research and learn about other perspectives to better understand and respect differences in the many cultures of the world I am curious about. It is also important to understand my own culture can easily be experienced as it states in this photo, “psychologically peculiar” by non-W.E.I.R.D.O.S.  I have a growth mindset and believe this is a journey that will span my lifetime.  

As our world becomes smaller and smaller thanks to advances in technology people will continue to experience enculturation on a more global scale and it will require tolerance and respect for the differences from their own native culture.  Once upon a time we could not imagine meeting a family from the Philippines without sailing across the ocean.  Only world leaders and leaders of large corporations were able to travel and communicate with other nations and their leaders.  Nowadays, it can be done with respect for the time difference via video chat.  These opportunities are going to become far more frequent and important to any leader, in any field, the world over.

Long term, this class will teach me not only to be self-aware when it comes to expectations of other cultures, but also to be empathic to those who may experience bewilderment in a cross-cultural situation they are not prepared for. I intend to use the skills and knowledge provided to engage in opportunities for me to help myself and others better communicate with and learn from more diverse groups of people as I continue my education and expand my career opportunities. 

What I learn can be used working as a career counselor, an investment advisor, a marriage counselor and honestly in any field as diversity is the new way of life.  I will take some pointers from Amy Chua and be accountable for my own success in this course by respecting deadlines for assignments and managing my time effectively to allow for plenty of review and studying so I am successful in this course, and I will watch for opportunities to apply what I learn into personal and professional real-life situations.