In a recent podcast interview, the rapper, T.I. revealed that he visits the gynecologist with his eighteen-year-old daughter, Dejyah Harris. This isn’t a common check up to ensure her health, but to ensure that her hymen is still intact, overall, seeing if she’s still a virgin or not. After unnecessarily airing out her personal business, he made it known that her virginity is still intact.
Not only is this a method of controlling his daughter, this also plays into the action of double standards between boys and girls when it comes to virginity and sex. T.I. and his wife have a reality tv show that gives viewers a glimpse of their every day lives with themselves and their children. A few seasons back, T.I.’s oldest son, King admitted that he lost his virginity at the age of fourteen. He is currently fifteen years old. King, of course didn’t get chastised in any way, unlike his sister. Instead of getting any form of parenting, T.I. was laughing about it and seemed somewhat proud. T.I. made it very clear in the clip after his son admitted to not being a virgin anymore, that he would feel different from a girl and a boy losing their virginity. He says, “I wouldn’t want any of my children having sex until it’s their time, but I can’t dictate that time for them. However, I would feel differently about a boy than a girl and that’s the truth. No other man can say they would feel differently.” T.I. elaborated that they have been doing these doctor appointments ever since Deyjah’s sixteenth birthday. He sets up a gynecologist appointment purposely after her birthday and leaves a sticky note on her bedroom door, informing her that he is taking her to the gynecologist that day. Another thing that was brought to light in this interview, is that he makes his daughter sign consent papers that ultimately give permission to the doctor to disclose this information to him.
I chose this topic because it’s wrong and it should not be normalized, but to a lot of people this is normal. This is an important issue that needs to be discussed because this happens every day to a lot of girls. In this case, it just happens that the girl is the daughter of a famous rapper which will help receive more traction to the issue. The main issue here is that Deyjah Harris, being eighteen years old is being ultimately forced by her father to get checked to make sure she is still a virgin by making sure her hymen is intact.
A hymen being intact in a women’s body is really no way to confirm that a woman is a virgin or not. There are many circumstances as to why a women’s hymen isn’t intact that doesn’t involve sex. This can be from sports, bike-riding, horseback riding, etc. It’s a common factor for most women to be born without a hymen. The hymen doesn’t dictate if a woman is a virgin or not. I did further research on this topic. I looked at an article, from the source of, “ABC Eyewitness News”. In this article, it also stated ‘that in the beginning of the appointments, the doctor that was accompanying them at the time was talking to the rapper, T.I. The doctor tried to make it clear before the exam that a women’s hymen can be broken due to various things and mentioned once again, a woman’s hymen can be broken during horseback riding, bike riding, and sports. T.I. proceeded to tell the doctor that his daughter doesn’t participate in any of those activities and they are there strictly to make sure she is still a virgin, completely disregarding or listening to what the doctor said before. The last statement made from T.I. during this podcast interview was, “I will say as of her 18th birthday, her hymen is still intact.”
In my opinion, what T.I. is doing to his daughter is a way of trying to control her and police her body. What he is doing is a complete violation of her body and her privacy. He isn’t taking her to the doctor to ensure that her health is good or there because she asked him to, he is simply making annually check ups to make sure his daughter isn’t having sex. Deyjah is eighteen years old, which makes her a legal adult and she can make her own choices at that age. What really stuck out to me was that he makes her sign confidentiality forms which completely waves her right to hold that information given to her about her own body to her father. It’s wrong that he is the one setting up the appointments and Deyjah has no choice but to go along with it and endure that humiliation.
T.I. didn’t have this energy when he found out his now fifteen-year-old son is sexually active. Him or his wife barely had a reaction to it, they mainly laughed about it. But when it comes to Deyjah, his oldest daughter, there is a significant amount of pressure on her to go to these doctor’s appointments with her dad there and ultimately having to prove herself still a virgin. The double standard is unfair because he’s underaged and he’s not receiving any strict parenting about that. Lastly, T.I, unnecessarily told his daughter’s business to the world and I don’t think this will be something people will forget. Deyjah is attending her first year of college and I could only imagine the embarrassment she may feel around her peers and other college kids. I believe there are people in the world who really do agree with T.I.’s antics. I believe people do things like this to their daughters all the time. Some people can just be very discrete about it and some aren’t.
Marchand, Katherine, and Ktrk. “Rapper T.I. Says He Takes Daughter to Gynecologist to Confirm She’s Still a Virgin.” ABC13 Houston, 8 Nov. 2019, https://abc13.com/entertainment/ti-says-he-takes-daughter-to-ob-gyn-to-confirm-shes-a-virgin/5678536/.