Assignment Takeaway
ATA5:
This week we were asked to carry out five random acts of kindness and document the reactions of the recipients. This was my favorite assignment to complete by far. I have always been passionate about helping others and being charitable, so I cannot say I learned more than I knew before hand. However, I did discover discover in my Human Services class how something as simple as a small act of kindness can greatly impact the self-esteem and self-concept of another person. My Human Services class provided a great opportunity to do just that with this weeks assignment. We were asked to reach out to three people and write each of them a letter of appreciation and discuss their reactions to our letters.
I love making people smile by giving compliments or doing something nice for friends and strangers. It makes me feel good knowing that I made their life a little easier or made their day better. With COVID-19 making life more difficult, I feel showing kindness is more important now more than ever to raise people’s spirits and increase morale. Some people are afraid to leave their houses to do even the most basic of tasks. Most of us are struggling financially because of job losses, while mental health wellness is on the decline due to a lack of social interaction. Therefore, I take any opportunity I can to do things for both strangers and people that hold a special place in my life.
Being a single mom has been a struggle for as long as I can remember. I have not had much help with my son throughout the years. However, an elderly neighbor of mine helped me with childcare on several occasions and was always there when I needed her. So, I wanted to do something nice. I decided to buy her groceries and give her a letter expressing my gratitude for everything she did for us.
I also visited former coworkers to surprise them. I gave them some homemade gifts. It felt good to make a difference in their day, especially after losing our jobs months prior. I was fortunate to still be working another job during the shutdown, but they were not. So, I wanted to brighten their day since they were stuck at home for months going stir crazy. I feel that gifts made from the heart mean so much more to people.
Another friend of mine gained some weight from depression after she lost her job. She was feeling really on herself. I decided to make her a positivity mirror so she could see all the beautiful qualities she possesses and practice positive affirmations while looking at herself. I want her to see herself as the rest her friends do. I made her a decorative candle as well. Smells like lavender may ease the anxiety she feels.
The last two acts were out of my love for being a mom and wanting to help spread some holiday cheer. Last year I could not afford to do anything for Christmas. I am in a much better situation now. So, I wanted to use the opportunity this year to help kids in need. I donated to the toys for tots and several other organizations. I wanted to make sure families struggling because of the pandemic were able to provide at least one gift to their children. Although I believe the thought is what truly counts, the sadness we feel as parents can be overwhelming when we cannot do something special for our children on Christmas.
While my son and I were eating dinner at Red Robin one night, we noticed a small boy who asked his mother for a milkshake and heard her say she could not afford it. We asked the waitress to see if we could purchase one for him as a gift. When the waitress asked the mom, she had a confused expression on her face at first but seemed genuinely grateful as she smiled at us and accepted. The boy lit up with excitement when she brought it to him moments later. It made my son smile because the little boy was so happy and said, “Thank you buddy!”
I have always taught my son to be a positive force in others’ lives through kindness and compassion. We have been active in the community with Micah Ministries since he was four years old. My hope is that the pandemic will come to an end and I will be able to go back and do more volunteering. Until then, I am happy make special packages of food to be delivered to the homeless.
I have been asked at times why I do community service. The answer is simple really, I enjoy making others happy. It warms my heart when I lift their spirits with kindness and compassion. Having been through much trauma, I know firsthand how important one simple act of kindness can be in helping someone. You never truly know what a person is going through. In some cases, your act of kindness could potentially be the difference between life or death
My visual image includes a picture of the gifts I made for my friends and a picture of the work I do in community service. These pictures represent who I am as a person, either by small act of kindness or a gesture of human compassion. This is the reason for my choice of photos.
ATA4:
The assignment for last week was based on the Styles of Love Questionnaire. My boyfriend Rob and I have been together for 2 years now. We are far from perfect, but we constantly push each other to be better human beings. When one of us falls, the other is there with support. We compliment each other well.
I found the results of the questionnaire to be fairly accurate, but I was surprised at the low score I received for the all giving love category. On the other hand, I know my last relationship made me more cynical and reserved. It does not mean I am not giving or unable to love to the fullest, but I am far more cautious about who I let into my life and heart.
I believe in monogamy and desire someone who is honest and faithful. I do not believe deceit in relationships or any other form can lead to a positive or constructive outcome. In addition, you should be able to openly communicate with your mate. You should treasure those you love.
Most of the questionnaire presented information I was already familiar with. Even though all my relationships differed, the men were the same. They were all abusive. It took many years to break the cycle, with the effects still lingering on every part of my life. As a result of my experiences, it is hard for me to trust and give into my feelings for the fear of being abandoned. Consequently, this is one reason for why I have never been the kind of person to rely on anyone. Whenever I feel myself getting to close, I tend to shut down and back off. Most of my trust issues stem from the trauma I experienced when I was married.
The key is to learn from each failed relationship and use our experiences to change and grow. There are those who bring out the best in us and others who bring out the worst. I am a believer that you need to form a strong friendship and have positive physical chemistry for a relationship to be successful. Lust can only take you so far.
This activity taught me that I never really thought much about how I chose my mate. I never really equated my family or career with who or why I chose the person I wanted to spend my life with. I just try to follow my heart and go with what feels right. I made some mistakes in the past with my choice of men. However, I think I finally got it right this time. The biggest factor of our relationship is my son. The reason I admire Rob is because of how he has taken him under his wing and made him feel like be belongs. My son is the most important person in my life, so it means more than anything in the world to me that he has a positive, active role-model in his life.
In my human services class, we are currently working on a chapter about building relationships and how to communicate effectively. It talks about how relationships are constantly changing because we are always changing. I think it goes together perfectly with the chapter in our book about different forms of relationships. Relationships in all forms are important because human interaction greatly impacts our overall mental and emotional well-being, particularly when it relates to family. This leads me to the reason for my choice of pictures, my family.
We have fun together and enjoy bonding over things such as music, video games, family functions, and amusement parks. We enjoy being goofy and making funny faces on snapchat. I like to take candid photos of him playing his guitar. No matter our disagreements, we always make up and never go to bed angry. My grandma taught me after my grandpa passed, never forget to say, “I love you”, or “I am sorry”. Life is short, you should let those closest to you know you love them. I regret I did not meet him sooner, but they say everything happens for a reason. When I feel like giving up, he is there to remind me of what a fighter I am. I am truly blessed.
ATA3:
Last week’s chapter focused on discrimination, prejudice, and stereotyping. Our assignment was a based-on video of a comedian known as Michael Richard’s. Richard’s went on a racial rant against a group of young black men who were heckling him during a performance at The Laugh Factory in California in 2006. The goal was to determine rather or not we believed these racial slurs were coming from a place of racism. After viewing the material, I concluded that his outburst was both emotionally and racially motivated. This assignment is relevant to experiences I have had in the past with people who use racial slurs.
For example, there was a time a co-worker came back from a delivery and looked angry. As he entered the store, me and a few co-workers heard him mumble racially derogatory remarks under his breath. I was surprised because he had never shown any signs of being racist. I decided to talk to him and figure out what was going on. He stated he was having a really bad day and was being mistreated by customers of a specific ethnicity. He then apologized for his use of racial slurs and genuinely looked ashamed. I could tell by his body language and the tone in his voice that he was sincere in his apology. However, one of the other co-workers confronted him and called him out as a racist. In conclusion, this assignment helped me better understand how to interpret the meaning behind someone’s words, actions, and behaviors through non-verbal communication and body language. I chose this image because it shows the negative impact racial discrimination can have on mental health and the serious medical disorders that can arise as a result. They can end up with severe anxiety, which we learned about in recent weeks. The picture reflects my belief that people need to be more aware of what they say and how they say it.
ATA2:
In Assignment #2, I reflected on my self-concept, self-presentation, and self-control. I feel the pictures I chose in the assignment best describe who I was and who I am today. Some people are influential and change themselves when in different situations or when they are around certain people. I have always tried to be true to myself and who I wanted to become no matter what social setting I am in. I try to improve the lives of those I love and cherish, even strangers.
In my human services class, I am also learning about how self-concept affects our self-esteem during different stages of our lives and the long-term effects it can have. Also, in chapter four of our textbook it talks about “The Self” and how we view ourselves. I learned that self-reflecting based on how other people view me is a good way to improve my understanding of who I am. Growing up, there were a lot times I looked to others and based my self-worth off how they viewed me. I believe that may have shaped my self-esteem in both positive and negative ways, but ultimately did not change who I am as a person. I have always been overly critical of myself. I know I am far from perfect, but I am constantly working to improve myself. There are have been some tough times in my life that have caused me to think or do things I normally would not, but many of my negative experiences have helped shape who I am today in a positive way. For better or worse, the experiences we go through give us wisdom we would not obtain otherwise. We may wish they did not happen or that we could erase them, but it is important to embrace these life lessons so we can continue to learn and grow.
The reason I chose the pictures of Princess Diana is because no matter what influenced my self-esteem in a good or bad way, I remain true to myself and take whatever positive I can from any situation. The first quote represents how I feel about everyone needing to be valued and the approach I take when dealing with other people. The second quote is relevant in that I am un-phased by other’s opinions and lead with the heart. Princess Diana changed the lived of others and inspired me to become the best version of myself I could be. I vowed to make sure that no matter what, I would never change my self-concept.